Psycho Killer (2026) – Boring Heads

Released: 20th February
Seen: 6th August

In 1995, the movie Se7en came out to good reviews and a great box office. It’s the film that made people start noticing David Fincher as a director, gave several people involved some much-needed career boosts and is nowadays considered an absolute classic of the genre, showing how genuinely intelligent and dark a crime thriller could actually be. The man who wrote it was Andrew Kevin Walker, who has written several other films, done script doctoring on some major works like Fight Club and even wrote an episode of Tales From The Crypt, so he should be considered a genuinely great writer… and he wrote the script for the movie Psycho Killer, so even the greats can write absolute trash.

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Avatar Aang: The Last Airbender (2026) – Bent

Released: 25th July
Seen: 3rd August

From 2005 to 2008, the animated TV series Avatar: The Last Airbender was released to massive love and acclaim. It was a huge hit series, widely considered one of the best animated series of all time and spawned countless imitators. It also has spawned a stunning amount of attempted reboots, from the successful follow-ups like The Legend of Korra to the much less successful (indeed, downright hated) live-action Avatar: The Last Airbender movie made by M. Night Shyamalan and the middling live-action series that’s been rated as “Fine” by most critics. It seems obvious to anyone looking at this that the franchise is at its best and most loved when animated. Of course, eventually they were going to probably do something to follow up the adventures of Aang the Avatar and so we got Avatar Aang: The Last Airbender, a perfectly fine animated movie that fans are gonna love… which is all it had to do, I guess.

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Scream 7 (2026) – Annoyed Yell

Released: 26th February
Seen: 2nd August

In November of 2023, it was announced that Melissa Barrera was no longer going to be a part of Scream 7. She was fired over a handful of posts she’d made calling the attacks in Gaza a genocide, these posts were deemed anti-semitic by Spyglass… they were not, they were calling out the actions of the government of Israel and specifically those of its leader, who right now has a warrant out for his arrest in relation to war crimes, specifically the genocide in Gaza. This was a pretty obvious overreaction back in 2023 but the feeling of anger towards Spyglass only grew as the war raged on and it became even more obvious that Melissa was right, which led to a lot of people calling for a boycott of Scream 7. This is why I didn’t go see the film during its initial release, despite loving this franchise which was my introduction to the horror genre that I love so much. Now Melissa has come out and said she’s moved on from everything, and the film made so much money that it feels silly to keep boycotting it (this isn’t a Harry Potter situation where the people who made it are so hateful that giving them a dollar actively harms others) so I finally saw it… and it’s probably the worst entry in this legendary franchise.

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Nirvanna The Band The Show The Movie (2026) – The Review

Released: 20th February
Seen: 29th July

From 2007 to 2009, Nirvana The Band The Show was uploaded to the internet (No relation to the band that gave us Smells Like Teen Spirit; that’s kinda the joke). There were 11 episodes spanning between 10 and 20 minutes, and it must’ve been popular because a decade later Nirvanna The Band The Show (Spelled with two ‘n’s from here on out, another one of their more subtle jokes) would turn into a full-on sitcom lasting for 2 seasons. The whole thing is a bit of a cult hit and I will admit I’d never even heard of it before this film came into my life so if you’re looking for information on if this is a good adaptation of the TV series then you’re not going to get that information here. I can’t compare and can’t even find a legally available copy to watch (because copyright law is totally well thought out and shouldn’t be changed at all /s). Fortunately, I don’t think you really need to have watched the TV series to appreciate Nirvanna The Band The Show The Movie because it’s good enough to stand on its own.

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Mortal Kombat II (2026) – Round 2, FIGHT!

Released: 8th May
Seen: 28th July

In 2021, a new adaptation of the video game Mortal Kombat came out. While its release was mildly hampered due to the pandemic (it was delayed and then released simultaneously in cinemas and on HBO Max because of that plague we all lived through and seem to want to pretend didn’t happen), the film did well enough and got moderately good reviews. I enjoyed it well enough but found it to be a little bit of a lore dump overstuffed with exposition that no one actually gives a fuck about because, while the lore of Mortal Kombat is surely fascinating, it’s not the thing that anyone really remembers about that franchise. The big thing was that we didn’t get to enjoy the tournament-style fights that the game franchise was known for and that felt like a big mistake… Well, Mortal Kombat II clearly heard everyone saying how much they wanted the tournament and decided to give us exactly that, and it’s a better movie because of it.

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Pizza Movie (2026) – Party

Released: 23rd March
Seen: 27th July

Stoner comedy might be one of the newer subgenres of film that exists. Sure, some people might say it dates back to the 30s with Reefer Madness, but that was mostly an accidental Stoner Comedy, failed propaganda that stoners would laugh at in midnight screenings because it failed its intended purpose. Realistically, the genre was started by Cheech and Chong in their run of movies from the late 70s through to the 80s. There’s been a fair few well-regarded stoner comedies since then; things like the Harold and Kumar series or most of Kevin Smith’s early output really helped explore what the genre could be. It’s been a little while since we’ve really had a good quality stoner comedy and now here comes Pizza Movie, and just like a real Pizza, even when it’s bad it’s still pretty good.

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The Sheep Detectives (2026) – Woolly Good

Released: 7th May
Seen: 25th July

In 2005, author Leonie Swann released her first book, Three Bags Full: A Sheep Detective Story, to much acclaim, selling over 100,000 copies within six months, which is wildly impressive (certainly better than most books about sheep, I imagine). One of those copies would eventually land in the hands of screenwriter Craig Mazin, who recently showed off his dramatic writing chops with the incredible series Chernobyl and the incredibly popular The Last of Us. I suspect after writing a couple of shows like that (especially Chernobyl, one of the most intense TV series I’ve ever sat through), Craig needed something light and fluffy to clear his head, and so he adapted Leonie’s novel into The Sheep Detectives and, in doing so, made one of the most adorably charming and surprisingly intelligent movies of 2026.

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In The Grey (2026) – Greyscale Guy

Released: 15th May
Seen: 24th July

Some directors have a certain style that you come to expect when you hear that they’ve made a film. You go to a Hitchcock film and you expect a film full of suspense, you go to a Tarantino film and you expect something very violent with a lot of swearing that borrows a lot of aesthetics from old movies you’d find in a drive in, you go see a Uwe Boll film and you expect to see the cinematic equivalent of testicular cancer. A director gives you a good idea of what kind of film you can expect to see, so what do you expect when you hear that Guy Ritchie has made a new film? You expect something exactly like In The Grey, a film that is so obviously made by Guy Ritchie that he didn’t even need to bother putting his name on the film because it’s so clearly a film in his style that it couldn’t be anyone else… It’s also just kind of dull.

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The Magic Faraway Tree (2026) – Whimsical

Released: 23rd March
Seen: 23rd July

Enid Blyton might be one of the most prolific authors in history, if we are to believe she wrote everything accredited to her (there’s controversy on that, but that’s for someone else to address). Between 1922 and her death in 1968, she is the credited author of 762 books which include such beloved series as the Magic Wishing Chair, Noddy and The Magic Faraway Tree. The Magic Faraway Tree is particularly memorable to people of my age (my guess is specifically those who lived in Australia and Britain) thanks to a short-lived TV series The Magic of the Faraway Tree, based on the books with one of the most strangely memorable theme tunes from the era. It’s one of those stories that feels like it was always destined to be a charming feel-good children’s film if they ever got around to making one… well, they got around to it and lo and behold, it does exactly what you would want such a film to do.

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The Super Mario Galaxy Movie (2026) – Player 2

Released: 1st April
Seen: 20th July

In 2023, Mario and Luigi made their grand transition from the world of video games to the world of animated films. The Super Mario Bros. Movie came out to massive fanfare, becoming the second-highest-grossing film worldwide of 2023 (just behind Barbie) and it basically proved that you could take this 40-year-old game series and make a film out of it that wasn’t an instant joke. The delightful bright coloured world of the Mushroom Kingdom was so enjoyable and inviting that it really shouldn’t have shocked anyone that it would go on to make over a billion dollars and, once it made that billion, it shouldn’t have been a shock that a sequel would be announced. Now we have The Super Mario Galaxy Movie and while it might not be as delightful as the film that came before it, it’s still a lot of fun.

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