In The Grey (2026) – Greyscale Guy

Released: 15th May
Seen: 24th July

Some directors have a certain style that you come to expect when you hear that they’ve made a film. You go to a Hitchcock film and you expect a film full of suspense, you go to a Tarantino film and you expect something very violent with a lot of swearing that borrows a lot of aesthetics from old movies you’d find in a drive in, you go see a Uwe Boll film and you expect to see the cinematic equivalent of testicular cancer. A director gives you a good idea of what kind of film you can expect to see, so what do you expect when you hear that Guy Ritchie has made a new film? You expect something exactly like In The Grey, a film that is so obviously made by Guy Ritchie that he didn’t even need to bother putting his name on the film because it’s so clearly a film in his style that it couldn’t be anyone else… It’s also just kind of dull.

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The Drama (2026) – DRAAAAMA

Released: 10th July
Seen: 21st July

It’s sadly an unavoidable reality that the mass shooting epidemic in America has exploded in recent years. Considering that the only year in recent history where there wasn’t a new mass shooting every other day was the lockdown year where it was literally impossible for such an event to happen, it’s the kind of thing that needs to be talked about and dealt with in some way. Since it’s clear that political figures won’t touch it, maybe some piece of art will crack through and make an impact (It’s unlikely, but it could happen) so for a film to use a mass shooting as an element of its plot isn’t automatically the worst thing in the world… However, if it uses something so heavy in a careless manner, that can create some serious issues with enjoying a film… so yeah, there’s some issues with The Drama.

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The Odyssey (2026) – Let’s Do The Odyssey

Released: 9th April
Seen: 20th July

In the 8th century BC, Homer wrote the epic poem The Odyssey. The poem spanned over 12,000 lines and told the story of a warrior trying to make his way back home, a story that would go on to be one of the most adapted tales in history. It’s been told as a straight-up epic, an opera, a crime comedy by the Coen brothers, a futuristic animated cartoon, if you can think of a way for someone to retell the story of The Odyssey, it’s probably been done. Probably the obvious way to tell the story is as the grandiose epic, after all an epic poem deserves an epic adaptation and this one has already had a few of those before… but until now, it hasn’t been thrown into the hands of a cinematic icon like Christopher Nolan who seems to revel in proving to the world that he’s one of the greatest filmmakers of all damn time.

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Project Hail Mary (2026) – Rocks

Released: 19th March
Seen: 1st July

One of the most beloved stories that cinema keeps going back to is “Man interacts with aliens”. It’s a time-tested story that allows for so many variations, from the whimsical wonder of ET to the nightmarish horror of The Thing, cinema has run the gamut of ways to show a human having to deal with a creature from another planet, figure out how to communicate with said creature and either save or destroy it. It’s been done so many times that we’re almost out of new alien designs that we can use before repeating ourselves. So one would think that another film about a human going to space and spending the entire time interacting with an alien would feel at least a little rote, a little repetitive… somehow, Project Hail Mary manages to feel fresh while also being charming as all hell.

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Supergirl (2026) – Averagegirl

Released: 25th June
Seen: 25th June

Roughly one year ago, Superman returned to us. After the absolute disaster that was the DCU, we were given a Superman who cares and there was much rejoicing. It was a genuinely charming movie with one of the best Superman actors we’ve had since the Christopher Reeve-era and I do not say that lightly. I named that film the second best film of 2025 and the performance of Superman was my third favourite performance in that same year. It was a genuinely great work of art that showed that there was space in the modern era for a kinder sweeter Superman. The ending of that film had a brief moment for Supergirl (Milly Alcock) who came to collect her dog Krypto and showed that this universe’s Supergirl was a bit of a drunken disaster who we would eventually get to spend an entire movie following. It was exciting, it seemed like it should be fun and now that film has come out and… it’s OK, it’s a genuinely OK movie but it should be so much better than OK.

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How To Make A Killing (2026) – Lethal

Released: 26th February
Seen: 20th June

Every few years we get a celebrity who is clearly being pitched as a leading man to the masses but, for some reason, just doesn’t seem to click. One of the more recent ones who has been undergoing this process is Glen Powell, it seemed to start around his appearance in Top Gun: Maverick and kept going with works like Hit Man, Anyone But You, Twisters (the image of him walking in the rain was almost scientifically designed to make audiences feral) and The Running Man. Each film basically just tried to give him star power, turn him into the affable, attractive leading man that anyone could root for. It’s clear that the industry wants him to be the next Tom Cruise-type but somehow they have yet to get him into a vehicle that puts him on that level. How To Make A Killing definitely wanted to be the thing that cemented him as that leading man but it flopped hard enough that it won’t be doing that, which is a shame because if it had hit it would’ve undoubtedly been the thing that made Glen into a generational star, even if the film itself isn’t great.

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Toy Story 5 (2026) – Technically Brilliant

Released: 18th June
Seen: 19th June

The Toy Story franchise feels like a miracle at this point, it’s certainly a franchise that goes past any reasonable explanation in terms of quality. The first film was basically a test to see if you could even make a full-length feature film using CGI characters and make it interesting, it went on to be the second-highest-grossing film of 1995 (I know, I feel old too just realising it’s been 31 years) and effectively killed the hand-drawn animation genre. Toy Story 2 was almost deleted by accident and intended to go straight to DVD, it ended up as the third highest-grossing film of 1999 and is widely considered as good as, or better than the original. Toy Story 3 came out nearly a decade later in 2010, had a six-year production period and seemingly closed the story out. It would go on to make a billion dollars, be the highest-grossing film of that year and finally win this franchise the Best Animated Feature Oscar. Then in 2019 came Toy Story 4, a film that many people doubted because the story was finished pretty perfectly in part three but it proved us wrong, creating another nearly perfect movie that again made a billion dollars and won this franchise its second Best Animated Feature Oscar. It’s kind of wild just realizing that this franchise has somehow produced four absolute classics of the genre and keeps finding new ways to delight young audiences with its story about a bunch of toys that come to life whenever you aren’t looking… Well, looks like we’re gonna have to make that five absolute classics because the bastards did it again.

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Pillion (2026) – BD-YES-M

Released: 19th February
Seen: 13th May

In November of last year, a phenomenon was released. Heated Rivalry was one of those things that probably shouldn’t have been a hit, an explicit gay romance story about two hockey players is the kind of thing that would normally end up being a big deal in the LGBTQIA+ community but wouldn’t really be a huge thing outside it so for this little show to become one of the biggest pop culture moments ever is stunning. The last time something this pointedly sexual got to be so mainstream was when 50 Shades Of Grey introduced suburban housewives to the world of BDSM (albeit doing it badly, according to people in the BDSM community). Of course, there are still works being made that play in the BDSM and queer worlds that don’t get mainstream coverage, such as the film Pillion which is probably a little too much for the mainstream, but it’s still quite spectacular in itself.

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“Wuthering Heights” (2026) – Too Hot, Too Greedy

Released: 12th February
Seen: 3rd May

In 1847, Emily Brontë released her first and only novel, Wuthering Heights, under the pen name Ellis Bell,. The story has gone on to be considered a classic, a gothic tragedy that has been told countless times since then. It’s inspired plays, operas, TV and film adaptations and of course the first single by the iconic Kate Bush. It’s also one of those books I haven’t had a chance to read yet so if you’re hoping to find out if this is an accurate adaptation, I’m not the man for that. I am pretty confident that this film is not the most faithful adaptation ever, but it’s also not trying to be faithful and if you meet it on the level it’s working at you might find there’s something interesting here.

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Mercy (2026) – Release Me

Released: 22nd January
Seen: 23rd March

For better or worse, we live in the era of AI… or at least the era of AI being brute-forced into our daily lives by billionaires who rely on it to turn a profit and make a couple of extra dollars. It’s in everything, it’s in all the apps you use, the very site I post this on offers AI to write a synopsis of what I post (you’ll be happy to know I never use it, I can write shitty unfunny synopsis’ all by myself), and it’s overtaken social media where it does fun things like “makes child sex abuse material” or “endorses white supremacy”. People are now losing jobs and being replaced by AI, which is incredibly faulty and has a high risk of errors… but no error is as big as the error that was made when someone decided to give Mercy a budget and allowed this film to exist because it’s just fucking bad.

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