One opinion on modern movies
Date Released: 31st March 2017
Date Seen: 4th November 2017
In 1999 the movie Baby Geniuses was released, a film about a bunch of babies who have superhuman intelligence who were kidnapped by a bunch of scientists who were trying to understand just how intelligent babies are. It was not a good movie. Boss Baby takes the “Hyper-intelligent baby” aspect and animated it. The results are… well, interesting would be the kind term.
Date Released: 17th February 2017
Date Seen: 3rd November 2017
When a film is pitched to a studio, it is normally done with something called a “Treatment” where the main points of the storyline are laid out in order to give executives an idea of just what they are going to invest in. Sometimes that treatment is several pages long, sometimes it’s just one page. I’m convinced the treatment for this film was “Charlie from It’s Always Sunny and Captain Dixon get in a fight” and that was literally it.
Date Released: 10th February 2017
Date Seen: 1st November 2017
In the late 80’s a film called 9 1/2 Weeks introduced the concept of the erotic thriller to the world of cinema, a subgenre of movies that would go on to be a large portion of the next decade with films like Basic Instinct, Fatal Attraction and Showgirls all making their mark in their own unique way, be it good or bad. Fifty Shades Darker would desperately like you to think it deserves to be put in the same class as those movies… Fifty Shades Darker is delusional about this desire.
Date Released: 6th April 2017 (Australian release date)
Date Seen: 31st October 2017
Written and Directed by Dax Shepard
Produced by Primate Pictures, RatPac-Dune Entertainment & Warner Bros.
A trend has emerged recently of big budget comedies based on classic TV series. We had the excellent 21 Jump Street movies, we had the mediocre Baywatch movie… naturally, we need the awful movie adaptation to round out the trilogy and lucky us, we got it.
Date Released: 4th May 2017 (Australian release date)
Date Seen: 30th October 2017
I have two dogs in my home right now as I type this… the stuff that they leave in large dark brown clumps that I occasionally step in is more inviting/interesting/decent than this movie.
Note: Before I start the review just a quick bit of info. I missed all of October due to University assessments, sorry. However, until the end of the year, I’m going to be retroactively reviewing movies that came out this year that I missed on initial release since I didn’t start doing this until about June. This is because I feel like I have time now… and because I want to make sure I don’t miss anything when I do a best/worst list at the end of the year. For these reviews, I’ll put the official date of release along with when I saw it just so everyone can laugh at how slow I am to the party
Date Released: 13th January 2017
Date Seen: 29th October 2017
Don’t think it
Don’t say it
And by “It” I mean this movie
Seen 30th September
Why do these movies start with “American” when the country of origin is really non-essential to the plot? Big movies with this title thing include American Pie… then American Psycho… then American Hustle, American Sniper, American Honey, American Gangster, American Mary, American Me, American Pastoral, American Ultra, American Graffiti, American History X, American Satan, American Beauty, American Made, American Wedding, American Pop, American Violence, American Hero, American Reunion, American Fable, American Gigalo, American Heist MY POINT IS ENOUGH WITH CALLING THINGS AMERICAN (NOUN)!… so, American Assassin
Seen 25th September
Earlier this year I went to see Rough Night and while I was watching that I was thinking “This is OK, but I bet if they dropped the shitty murder plotline and just focused on the women having a good time, it’d be funnier”… sure enough, I got my wish.
Seen September 23rd
First there was the Lego Movie, and it showed everyone that you could create a piece of art using a licenced toy that was actually good. Then came Lego Batman, which showed you coulde play around in multiple established universes and still tell your own story. Then there was Ninjago… it was a movie.
Seen 14th September
Hello Muddah,
Hello Fuddah,
I saw a movie
What the fuckah?
independent and curious
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