Pinocchio (2022) – Wooden

Released: 8th September
Seen: 18th September

Pinocchio Info

In 1940, high off the release of the first feature-length animated motion picture, Disney released Pinocchio. While we look back on Pinocchio as an absolute classic that would eventually be a box office success upon its 1945 re-release, the original release was a complete flop thanks to being released during WW2 which cut off several major markets. Since then, Pinocchio has become an absolute staple of the Disney company, Jiminy Cricket was basically a secondary mascot for a period of time considering how many specials he turned up in and the song “When You Wish Upon A Star” not only became the first Disney song to win an Oscar but became the Disney theme song. This film has been a core moment of pop culture that still resonates in some form… and because we are living in a time where Disney must remake every one of their classic films, we have another D-make and it’s just kind of bland.

Continue reading “Pinocchio (2022) – Wooden”

Pussy Cake (2022) – Goopy Goodness

Seen at the Sydney Underground Film Festival

Pussy Cake Info

In Argentina, the title of this film is Emesis. Emesis, for those who aren’t wanting to google or don’t know this off the top of your head, is another word for vomiting. This title genuinely suits the film as there is a considerable amount of vomiting going on. It also brings up images of sickness, perfect for a movie about a mysterious otherworldly plague. Emesis is the kind of odd but intelligent title that could really work well when placed alongside a disturbing film like this… or we could just rename it Pussy Cake for the English-speaking audiences because Pussy Cake is a goddamn amazing title that might not mean a damn thing but it’s fun to say.

Continue reading “Pussy Cake (2022) – Goopy Goodness”

Dual (2022) – Deadpan Double

Seen at the Sydney Underground Film Festival

One of the most fascinating kinds of film is the twin film, a movie where one actor is tasked with playing 2 or more roles. There’s always just something exciting about seeing one actor trying to give off performances that are distinct enough that we can tell who is who while also looking identical. This is the kind of thing that’s been done for years, like any time they revive The Parent Trap or in something as recent as this year’s Samaritan where there needed to be two versions of Stallone in order to pull off the dramatic twist in the final act. It’s a great tool that, if used well, can make for something genuinely amazing… or at very least it can be a great display for the actor taking on the multiple roles.

Continue reading “Dual (2022) – Deadpan Double”

Swallowed (2022) – Slimy Yet Satisfying

Seen at the Sydney Underground Film Festival

Swallowed Info

When it comes to queer representation in cinema, we’ve come pretty far in recent years by having some pretty mainstream movies throw in some form of representation. Sure it’s been minimal, like the 3-second lesbian kiss in Lightyear that sent everyone insane for a month or when a rock monster was revealed to have two dads but still, it happened. It’s fun to see gay characters popping up and more queer storylines in general… even when they turn up in dark horror/thrillers about drug trafficking, still fun to see.

Continue reading “Swallowed (2022) – Slimy Yet Satisfying”

Cult Hero (2022) – Worshippable

Seen at the Sydney Underground Film Festival

Cult Hero Info

The world of religion is a wild place even at the best of times, but when religion is at its worst you get a cult. Cults come in all shapes and sizes, from small things like Heaven’s Gate to seemingly large abusive groups like Scientology and they all just pull people into their web and ruin their lives in some way. Sometimes when someone is in a cult you might need to hire someone known as a deprogrammer who will do what they can to pull your loved one out of this toxic environment… and naturally a situation that’s this intense and fraught with danger is just perfect to be the foundation for a comedic action film.

Continue reading “Cult Hero (2022) – Worshippable”

The Pez Outlaw (2022) – Impezive

Seen at the Sydney Underground Film Festival

It is a truth universally known that Pez is a disgusting candy that no one actually likes. It tastes like chalk that somehow lost all its flavour and it’s shaped like a depressed brick that hates itself. The only reason that they’ve sold so well (and this is merely an opinion) is due to the undeniably clever and adorable design of the Pez dispensers. These dispensers are obscenely popular, chances are good that you have one somewhere in your house even if you’ve never actually bought one… and, naturally, they have an entire underground system of collectors who go to insane lengths to get all the rarest Pez dispensers. You would think that a group of Pez dispenser collectors would be boring and not have any remotely exciting stories… The Pez Outlaw is here to prove you dead wrong.

Continue reading “The Pez Outlaw (2022) – Impezive”

Exposing Muybridge (2022) – Photogenic

Seen at the Sydney Underground Film Festival

Exposing Muybridge Info

Every film student at some point has had to look at a set of images that would show the power of motion pictures in a way no one had ever seen before it was made. Those images were of a horse galloping, roughly 16-20 photos showing the horse in different poses that when shown in rapid succession created the appearance of a galloping horse. These images were taken by Eadweard Muybridge  (yes, that is how he chose to spell it) in 18-whatever and basically showed the power of sequential photos and how they could create movement. It’s basically one of the foundational images that created cinema and in Exposing Muybridge, we learn about the man that made it happen and his strange and at times controversial life.

Continue reading “Exposing Muybridge (2022) – Photogenic”

Pig Killer (2022) – Slop

Seen at the Sydney Underground Film Festival

In 2002, Robert “Willy” Pickton was arrested on suspicion of two counts of first-degree murder. By the time his trial began in 2006, the number of charges had gone up to 27 and by the time he was convicted, Robert Pickton would confess to the murders of 49 women and said he would’ve made it to 50 if he hadn’t gotten sloppy. His murder spree is absolutely horrific, he’s one of the worst serial killers in Canadian history so it’s kinda only natural that someone was going to inevitably use this horrific story to make some form of horror film… did the film have to be this terribly tasteless? Well, yes because the actual case is pretty damn tasteless too but it doesn’t help that the film isn’t great.

Continue reading “Pig Killer (2022) – Slop”