Released: 25th March
Seen: 8th June
In 2024, a little film called Abigail came out and showed people that the combination of ballerinas and bloodshed could end up making a genuinely fun film if done well. Something about the combination of this glamorous artform that’s largely considered the realm of young women and girls blended with about 50 gallons of the red stuff is a recipe for a good time that the whole family can enjoy (provided your family is suitably fucked up). While Abigail was a ton of fun, it didn’t do quite as wel at the box office as it probably should have, thanks to an ad campaign that gave away the film’s big twist… but hey, at least it got a cinematic release unlike the delightfully fun Pretty Lethal which had to take its blood-soaked ballerinas to enjoy them on streaming instead.
Pretty Lethal follows a troupe of ballerinas, Zoe (Iris Apatow), Princess (Lana Condor), Chloe (Millicent Simmonds), Grace (Avantika) and Bones (Maddie Ziegler) who are about to perform in Budapest as part of an international competition. They’re being chaperoned on this trip by their teacher Thorna Devonport (Lydia Leonard) and at first things are going about as well as they can, considering the girls have never really been able to get along and are slowly driving each other crazy. At some point their bus breaks down and they seek refuge in the Teremok Inn, an old building run by the powerful matriarch Devora Kasimer (Uma Thurman). While there, Thorna accidentally sees something she absolutely should not have seen… namely Devora torturing a man who wronged her because, it turns out, Devora is the head of a crime family and everyone else in that building are hardened criminals who won’t think twice about killing a bunch of ballerinas who might expose them. There’s only one thing for the troupe to do… kill as many gang members as they can to try and get out in time for their big performance.
Pretty Lethal isn’t reinventing the wheel, it’s not even really trying to. It delivers pretty much everything you expect from a film with the premise “People stuck in the middle of nowhere have to escape from a group of people who want to murder them”, if you’ve seen one of those movies you’ve pretty much seen them all and this is no exception to that. Everything from the initial moments of trying to comply for safety, to the first person fighting back, to the reluctant person accidentally kicking ass right down to every one of our hero characters flipping a switch and becoming badasses is here. It’s all so familiar you could almost call every beat and every witty line that’s thrown out during the fight scenes… and it’s an absolute blast while doing it.
While Pretty Lethal might be playing the same notes that so many other films before it have played, the way it’s presenting those notes are what makes it so enjoyable. For starters, the central cast is truly terrific, the five ballerina girls are so lovely that it’s so easy to root for all of them and each one just dives headfirst into some truly incredible characterisations. Bones is the badass, Chloe is innocent, Grace is heavily sheltered, Princess is a bitch (complimentary) and Zoe is… ok Zoe is kind of just there and doesn’t really have any memorable elements, frankly at times I forgot she was even on screen, but she still has her moments when she’s with the main group. The way the main group of five women bounce off each other or kick ass while doing some genuinely difficult-looking ballet moves is captivating to witness.
It also helps that Pretty Lethal looks really good, a lot of bright colours that give the piece a heightened tone that really works for this kind of film. It helps you stop trying to put this in any reality, so when the film decides to go absolutely batshit in the final act you’re fully on board and enjoying this wild ride that they’re putting you on. It also really helps the fight scenes, the sprays of blood hitting the pretty pink tutus is just so gloriously dramatic that it’s hard not to be impressed with everything that these women are doing. The heightened tone accompanied with a breakneck pace makes for a quick easy viewing experience.
Now, obviously, not every moment lands perfectly. There’s the previously mentioned problem of one of the main girls really being kind of pointless. Some parts are so familiar that it’s hard to really enjoy the proceedings because you know where it’s gonna go. Then there’s the villains of the piece who, apart from a deliciously hammy Uma Thurman, are forgettable and basically there just to give us a body count. While its faults aren’t going to stop the film being enjoyable, they do keep it from being the great over-the-top action romp it’s so close to being.
Pretty Lethal might not be groundbreaking, but it can be fun enough to make for a decent time. It’s helped by a game cast and a few fight scenes that perfectly blend some bloody violence with precise ballet moves that can be amusing more often than not. It drops the ball a few times, some parts don’t work quite as well as they’re clearly wanting them to but they pick that ball right back up again pretty quickly and keep going. It’s the kind of film that’s just good fun, maybe not the most elaborate thing ever but it certainly has moments that keep the audience on their toes.
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