Luca (2021) – Looka At This, It’s Cute (and a little bit gay)

Released: 18th June
Seen: 18th June

Luca Info

With all the films that are going to Disney’s premier service lately I’ve noticed a weird pattern regarding the films that they don’t throw a surcharge on the second it pops up… namely that they’ve been, largely, kind of bad. Sure there’s exceptions like Soul or Onward, but other films like Magic Camp, Stargirl and Artemis Fowl (a film that, no joke, didn’t pop up on their site’s list of original films when I went to look before writing this). Basically if a film skips cinemas and just pops up on Disney Plus I’m going to be going in with some trepidation… and then they just throw something like Luca up there and I wonder if they even know when they have a good thing on their hands.

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Wish Dragon (2021) – A Charming Little Wish

Released: 11th June
Seen: 16th June

Wish Dragon Info

So earlier this year, Disney released the film Raya and the Last Dragon. It was a pretty great film as a lot of Disney’s animated fare tends to be but there was this weird thing going around where people wrote off its box office as a failure because it only made 130 million worldwide on a 100 million budget. For some reason this is a thing that keeps coming up this year where films are having their box offices judged based on pre-pandemic expectations, as though we’re completely through the wilderness. Spoilers, we’re not. Anyway I bring this up because I wonder if the supposed failure of Raya and the Last Dragon led to today’s film Wish Dragon not getting as much attention as it deserves which is a shame because Wish Dragon is charming.

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Psycho Goreman Header

Psycho Goreman (2021) – Glorious Cheese

Released: 3rd March
Seen: 16th June

Psycho Goreman Info

Sometimes it really does surprise me just how understated some reviews can be about certain films. Due to this being a very small blog, I don’t really get to be ahead of the curve that much. I’m not on any press lists unless Soda & Telepaths hooks me up, screeners for any of the major streaming services don’t tend to fall in my lap and throw on top of that the reality of me being in Australia which is usually late to get a lot of these weird films. That’s why there’s still at least 2 major Oscar films I never reviewed, it takes a while for me to get to some of these films and usually there’s a critical consensus about them already by the time I see them… The critics have undersold how gloriously bonkers Psycho Goreman is, in their defence the brilliant insanity of this film is something that might be beyond mortal comprehension but let’s try.

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The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard Title Card

The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard (2021) – It’s a little looney

Released: 24th June
Seen: 10th June (Advance Screening)

The Hitman's Wife's Bodyguard Info

4 years ago, The Hitman’s Bodyguard was released to theatres and it was a cartoon-scented blast of joy straight to the heart. A giddy concoction made up of equal parts explosions and the word “motherfucker” that gave the audience a mindless ride that went for a few hours with some of the most charismatic stars to be put on this planet. Naturally, a movie that’s going for something that broad made bank and so, with The Hitman’s Wife’s Bodyguard, we get a sequel that’s more of what we saw before and thank god for that because I need that familiar sense of normalcy.

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Dream Horse

Willy’s Wonderland (2021) – Five Hours At Willy’s

Released: 21st April
Seen: 31st May

Willy's Wonderland Info

It’s fairly well known that right now a Five Nights At Freddy’s movie is sitting in development hell where it’s lingered for the last 5 years. In that time it’s changed studios and directors and gone through many, many scripts. Currently they are talking about shooting this thing sometime this year, but we’ve heard that song and dance before. The wait has gotten so long for this movie that we’ve already had one knockoff beat it to release, in the form of The Banana Splits Movie. Well, now Willy’s Wonderland is here to show you another version of the Five Nights formula… and this time, I think they got the tone right.

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Yes Day Promo Image

Yes Day (2021) – Not On This Day

Released: 12th March
Seen: 6th May

Yes Day Info

Films, in general, are full of tropes. Some hide them better than others but every film has them. The trick is to either hide them well enough behind interesting characters and dialogue that no one cares or to find ways to subvert them or put them together in new and interesting ways. Then there’s the films that don’t even bother to try and hide their tropes and just hope you’re stupid enough to enjoy them. Yes Day is kind of the queen of trope films for 2021 and unfortunately for it, I’m not as stupid as I look.

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The Mitchells vs the Machines Header

The Mitchells vs the Machines (2021) – The Animated Charmer Of The Year

Released: 30th April
Seen: 2nd May

The Mitchells vs the Machines Info

Sony Animation has had something of an interesting history in regards to their output over 20 films. They’ve run the gamut when it comes to quality, from the objectively awful fare like The Emoji Movie to some of the best animation in history with Spider-Man: Into The Spider-Verse. Slowly they’ve gone from an animation company people would cringe about to one that actually gets a lot of excitement going with their new releases. So, where does The Mitchells vs the Machines fall in regard to the rest of Sony Animation’s output? It’s borderline perfect.

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Thunder Force (2021) – Super Pooper

Released: 9th April
Seen: 29th April

The Superhero genre has been the biggest thing in movies for a little over the last decade, largely thanks to the Marvel Cinematic Universe that has somehow managed to go from strength to strength. When something is as culturally important as the Superhero genre has been for the last several years it stands to reason that someone would come along and satirize the tropes that by this point have become tiresome… or, if you’re something as unabashedly awful as Thunder Force, you could not make a single decent joke despite a decades worth of material you’ve been gifted and instead rely on the talents of two leads who aren’t miracle workers and can’t make you even remotely humorous. 

Yes, this is one of those angry reviews about a bad film, go get a soda because we will be here a while.

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