365 Days: This Day (2022) – It Still Hurts

Released: 27th April
Seen: 28th April

The year was 2020, we were deep into the horrors of the pandemic and thus desperate for things to keep us entertained since everything was shutting down, which is how a film like 365 Days was able to get dropped on Netflix and become a massive hit on the service… now, granted, everyone could readily admit that the film was a giant piece of shit and was openly mocking how awful it was every chance possible but that didn’t change the fact that it was a monster hit.

It was critically savaged and called out for being a romanticisation of rape that was a poorly filmed/acted/written/scored piece of garbage… and that’s just from my own personal description of it when I gave it the top spot on my worst of 2020 list. 

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Cyrano (2022) – Cyra-Yes

Released: 24th February
Seen: 6th March

Cyrano Info

In 1897, playwright Edmond Rostand wrote Cyrano de Bergerac which would supposedly tell the life story of the real Savinien de Cyrano de Bergerac. This play has been adapted several times since its creation, not only straight forward adaptations but even inspiring films such as The Ugly Truth or Sierra Burgess Is A Loser. Throughout the years there have also been several attempts to adapt this play into a stage musical, including one in 2019 that starred Peter Dinklage in the title role. It’s that adaptation that was turned into Cyrano, a film that was stunningly only nominated for one Oscar this year (but we’ll get to why that’s stunning in a little bit).

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A Ghost Waits (2020) – A Ghostly Love Story

NOTE: Here is my review from Soda & Telepaths that was posted back on October 23, 2020

A Ghost Waits is a low budget horror rom-com that follows a simple house cleaner named Jack (MacLeod Andrews) who has been given the job of cleaning up an abandoned house. He’s heard that this house keeps losing tenants for some reason and part of his job is to make sure everything is up to code since maybe the tenants keep leaving because the heating doesn’t work or they found structural damage and just split. Turns out there’s no real structural damage to the building… however, there is a ghost named Muriel (Natalie Walker) and she is as terrible as all Muriel’s are and her job is to scare anyone out of the house that Jack is cleaning. What follows is one of the weirdest love stories in recent years.

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Single All The Way (2021) – Merry and Gay

Released: 2nd December
Seen: 6th December

Last year the Christmas film Happiest Season came out to rave reviews, as it should. It was a simple, sweet, charming Christmas film that also broke boundaries by being a wide release Christmas film that featured a gay couple. Strangely, Christmas films focusing on members of the LGBT community either have to be little underground affairs that don’t get big releases by major companies… well, Netflix clearly wanted to try and correct that by making their own gay Christmas film, Single All The Way. I guess it’s nice to know that we’re getting to the point where gay Christmas films can just be as cliched as the straight ones.

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The Power Of The Dog (2021) – Powerful

Released: 1st December
Seen: 4th December

It’s kind of strange to realise that Jane Campion hasn’t directed a feature film in over a decade. She’s one of those names that is on the shortlist of absolutely legendary directors even with only eight feature films to her name. She’s just one of those people who you expect a certain level of excellence from and with her first feature film in over a decade, The Power of the Dog, she reminds us why she is one of the great filmmakers of our time.

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Trust (2021) – Intriguing

Released: 12th March
Seen: 24th November

Trust Info

You know, lately we’ve had a run of seriously bad sex dramas that are less sexy and dramatic and more like painful farces designed to make us pay for our sins. 50 Shades, After, 365 Days, all of them (and their terrible sequels) sexy dramatic films designed to titillate and intrigue that mostly just get on the thinking audience’s tits. They’re not good and not fun, what ever happened to fun sex dramas? Well, looks like Trust might be just barely good enough to show that there might still be some actual creativity left in this admittedly tawdry genre.

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The Kissing Booth 3 (2021) – ARRRRGH

Released: 27th August
Seen: 5th September

The Kissing Booth 3 Info

Sometimes I genuinely worry for Netflix, I really do. In their desperate need to fill up their library with films that can’t be taken away by competing studios who want to start their own awful streaming service (Tangent: The Paramount Plus streaming service is crap and they should delete it now before they hurt themselves) they just greenlight everything that’s remotely in their price range. Sure this led to the recent trilogy of Fear Street films that were absolutely amazing, but it also led to the series The Kissing Booth which culminates in The Kissing Booth 3, a film which makes me hate the concept of kissing, booths and the word “The”.

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He’s All That (2021) – That Don’t Impress Me Much

Released: 27th August
Seen: 29th August

He's All That Info

Pygmalion is a 1913 play by George Bernard Shaw about a little flower girl being taught how to be a proper English lady after a bet between two men, Higgins and Pickering. If this sounds familiar to those who’ve never heard of Pygmalion that’d be because this play ended up being the inspiration for the mega musical My Fair Lady. It also inspired the 1999 film She’s All That, which hasn’t aged well but I promise you was a gigantic hit back in the day. It was part of this period of time where a lot of classic stories got updated for a 90s teen audience and it might have been the most successful of the bunch, although Cruel Intentions and 10 Things I Hate About You have seemed to live on a lot stronger in pulp culture.

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Love Weddings And Other Disasters Header

Love, Weddings and Other Disasters (2021) – Uggh

Released: 28th January
Seen: 19th July

So, currently, my home state is going through a lockdown thanks to covid, which means that I’m basically relegated to only reviewing movies I can see from home… and because I’m Australian that means anything that WB releases is not available for streaming down here, so that’s why you’re not seeing a Space Jam 2 review and might not even see a Suicide Squad review (unless I somehow find a way to make HBOMax work from down here which feels like too much effort for those films). This means I’m going to have to review Netflix movies or films that are cheap on Google Plus and that’s what led me to Love, Weddings and Other Disasters which is a film so painfully bad that it makes me regret almost everything in my life up to this exact second.

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Good on Paper (2021) – Blank Page: The Movie

Released: 23rd June
Seen: 13th July

Good on Paper Info

When a stand-up comic takes their act and turns it into a movie you can have a few different results. If you want a really good example of a comic’s act made into a pretty good movie, Trainwreck took Amy Shumer’s set and created a fairly fun film with enough jokes to make it through. You could also just film a particularly important set and release it, like Kathy Griffin did with her most recent comedy special that revolved around her recent controversy… third option is to take one specific joke from a set, make it into a film and forget to put jokes in there completely. Sure, that idea might sound good on paper but in practice you get… well, the film Good On Paper.

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