Bad Boys For Life (2020)

NOTE: So for the last 2 years I’ve been producing reviews for Soda & Telepaths who sadly closed their doors at the end of 2021. Thus, I now have a large amount of assorted reviews from the last 2 years that need somewhere to go and so they will be put here… slowly, on days I don’t have a new review to put up so I won’t flood anyone’s page/emails with a dozen reviews.

These are as close to how they were over on S&T, though that site had a different layout and style I had to work within so it might not be exactly 1 for 1. Also, in some cases, old reviews might have been deleted from the site before I got to them (like this one) and I have to rely on old notes I took.

With all that in mind, here is my first review for S&T that was posted back on January 16th, 2020.

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Don’t Look Up (2021) – Look Straight Ahead

Released: 25th November
Seen: 26th December

Don't Look Up Info

There’s a joke that’s been going around lately that relates to the way that the entire planet has responded to the insanity of the covid pandemic. “Guess we have to remove the phrase ‘avoid like the plague’ from our lexicon since we apparently don’t know how to do that”. It’s a dark commentary on how we as a species just seem to be unable to mildly inconvenience ourselves in the short term in order to avoid long term catastrophe. Of course, this isn’t a new phenomenon, it’s been happening for years around Climate Change among a host of other issues. This strange behaviour is what a film like Don’t Look Up is trying to comment on but it has the slight problem of having to compete with the actual insanity of reality.

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Encanto (2021) – Enchanting

Released: 25th November
Seen: 11th December

Encanto Info

Disney animated movies lately feel pointless to review. What’s there to say? “So, the company known for making really good animated films made a really good animated film… again”. Great, there’s the entire review of Encanto in a sentence that’s above my usual cut so now you know the obvious thing that you assumed the second you saw the poster hanging about. Congrats, you beat me to the punchline… still gonna review it anyway because what else am I gonna do with my free time? Hobbies? HA!

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Single All The Way (2021) – Merry and Gay

Released: 2nd December
Seen: 6th December

Last year the Christmas film Happiest Season came out to rave reviews, as it should. It was a simple, sweet, charming Christmas film that also broke boundaries by being a wide release Christmas film that featured a gay couple. Strangely, Christmas films focusing on members of the LGBT community either have to be little underground affairs that don’t get big releases by major companies… well, Netflix clearly wanted to try and correct that by making their own gay Christmas film, Single All The Way. I guess it’s nice to know that we’re getting to the point where gay Christmas films can just be as cliched as the straight ones.

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The Jinkx and DeLa Holiday Special (2020) – Terminally Delightful

Released: 1st December 2020
Seen: 6th December

Review copy provided

You know, around this time of year we all have a traditional Christmas special we might like to dig out. There are things like the classic Charlie Brown Christmas Special, maybe you’re a fan of some Rankin Bass classics or you like to go a little off the beaten track and pull out the Pee Wee Herman Christmas Special. These are all absolute classic choices that work great for every kind of child… but what about after you’ve grown up? What special works for the modern day jaded adult who only makes it through the Christmas season through a temporary dip into alcoholism and passive aggression? Well, that’s why we have drag queens to help provide us with the adult holiday special we didn’t know we needed.

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Extinct (2021) – Holey Moley

Released: 16th September
Seen: 20th November

Extinct Info

Sometimes you just look at a poster for a film and you just know that this is going to be a bad time, you just have that undeniable feeling that whatever you’re about to go through for the next hour and a half is going to be excruciating. Upon seeing the poster for Extinct it’s hard to deny that the feeling of “Oh god” was running rampant, and that feeling only got worse upon seeing the trailer. Well, the good news is that Extinct is not as awful as one might’ve expected based on first appearances… but that’s only because it’s so middle of the road that awfulness might be an improvement.

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Jungle Cruise (2021) – Ship Shape

Released: 29th July
Seen: 12th November

Jungle Cruise Info

The history of movies based on theme park rides is littered with dull trash that offers nothing exciting. Think about it, with the exception of Pirates of the Caribbean and the recent Muppets Haunted Mansion, there aren’t exactly a lot of theme park movies that turn out to be passable let alone actually good. This would explain why, when the announcement of a Jungle Cruise movie was made, it was met with a collective sigh and many people preparing for it to suck… and now it’s out, up on Disney Plus without the premium price and oh my god how is this thing so good?

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Home Sweet Home Alone (2021) – Homesick

Released: 12th November
Seen: 12th November

Home Sweet Home Alone Info

In 1990 a little film called Home Alone was released. On a budget of a little under $20 million, the film went on to make about $476 million worldwide and become an instant classic that spawned exactly 1 good sequel and then 3 films that technically exist. Home Alone influenced so many other film makers who all took a shot at the “Kid makes an elaborate set of traps around the house that leads to an endless amount of slapstick” genre, which is why we have atrocities like The War With Grandpa. So many people have tried to recreate the magic of the original film and no one has pulled it off… and adding to that “Can’t pull off the magic of Home Alone” pile is Home Sweet Home Alone, a film that doesn’t even pretend to understand what made the original special and just desperately cashes in on a 30 year old property without any effort whatsoever.

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Red Notice (2021) – S’fine

Released: 12th November
Seen: 12th November

Red Notice Info

Usually a film begins with a script or an idea, going through a lot of pre-production before they even think about casting but sometimes there are films that are made entirely around a single cast member. Those films that are either designed to really show off what an actor can do or just to play to their strengths… Red Notice is that latter film and it’s so ridiculously simple that it’s almost impossible to truly hate, but probably won’t be up there on the “best of the year” lists either.

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Locked Down (2021) – Lock It Up

Released: 14th January
Seen: 5th November

Locked Down Info

Covid has had an interesting effect on the world of cinema, not only have people had to postpone some pretty major films or change how they film them but some have decided that they’re going to use this hellish time as inspiration. This has led to some genuinely incredible films like Host but it’s also led to absolute drek like Songbird. One of the films that I remember being advertised very early on in this pandemic was a little comedy heist film called Locked Down and the memory was that the trailer promised a good time… the trailer lied, this film is shit and I’m going to complain about its shitness.

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